


The Beginning, The Ending, and The In-Between

by PrepareThePreparations



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Complicated Relationships, Friendship, Gen, Light Angst, Pre-Canon, Pre-Episode: Accepting Anxiety, could be read as one-sided anxceit or just as friendship, dark sides centric, light sides mentioned, only rated t based on light swearing and Remus being... Remus, possibly unsympathetic Deceit but not really? The dude's just got issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-27
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 10:01:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23349601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrepareThePreparations/pseuds/PrepareThePreparations
Summary: How Virgil arrived, became who he is, and eventually joined the light sides, from Remus's point of view. Heavily focus's on Virgil's relationship's and interactions with the dark sides, specifically Deceit.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit Sanders
Comments: 10
Kudos: 60





	The Beginning, The Ending, and The In-Between

It was late, and the new kid was pacing again. He did that a lot. Paced and mumbled. Remus could hear it through the wall. 

Remus hadn’t really talked to him much. He thinks that the new kid is afraid of him. To be fair though, it seemed like the new kid was afraid of everything. He was skittish and jumpy, always shrinking away from touch and avoiding eye contact. He rarely spoke, and when he did, he mumbled. 

Deceit had been the one to find him and bring him home. Apparently he'd been wandering around the edges of the mindscape. 

He stuck close to Deceit most of the time, and so far Deceit was too pleased at getting to play the hero to an enamored audience that he hadn’t done anything to change that yet. Remus thought that it was cute, like a duckling imprinting on the first person it saw. A mopey, insomniac, emo duckling.

Deceit had warned him away from messing with the new kid too much, which was a shame because he was a ridiculously easy target. 

For the lack of a better word, Deceit was protective, or maybe possessive was a better fit, of the new kid. Deceit was keeping him as far from the others as he could. Remus doubted that the light sides even knew that there was a new side. If they had, they’d probably have come poking around by now.

Remus wasn't sure why he was so against him meeting the light sides, but he didn’t care enough to question it. Besides, it was only fair that they got to keep him! There were three of them, they should get three on their side too. 

There were footsteps in the hall, then a knock. A door opened, then soft voices. Sounds like Deceit had heard him too. 

Remus went back to bed.

* * *

Paranoia talked more now, although he was still shy and easy to startle.

That was the title that they had decided on. Paranoia. Well, that was the title Deceit had decided on. Remus felt like it didn’t really fit, or at least that it didn’t fit completely, but the kid hadn’t protested it, so Paranoia he was.

Behind his nerves and shyness, Paranoia had a dry, sarcastic sense of humor, and a mean streak that rivaled Deceit’s when pushed enough. Remus had decided that he liked him a lot. He wasn’t sure whether or not that sentiment was returned, but at least Paranoia didn’t flinch every time they made eye contact anymore. 

Despite admittedly being just a little too soft and moralistic to truly fit in with them, Paranoia was a good addition to the group. He bantered back at Deceit, something Remus had never had the patience or wit for, and usually at least smiled at Remus's jokes, even the most bizarre and gory ones. 

He still spent most of his time with Deceit, but now it was more on Deceit’s end then his. Remus never would’ve described Deceit as clingy before, and he still never would to his face, but that was unmistakably the impression that he was giving off. He even would start to become cagey during Paranoia’s random bouts of locking himself alone in his room for days. He said that he was worried, but Remus was pretty sure he just didn’t like being ignored. Remus wasn’t sure why he took it so personally. Some people just liked to be alone.

* * *

Remus wasn’t there for it, but Paranoia had met the light sides finally. Based on the clenched fists, and teary eyes, it hadn’t gone well.

To Paranoia, Deceit was the picture of a comforting and protective friend. Lobbing insults at the light sides and gushing reassurances to Paranoia in the same breath. 

Away from Paranoia, he was full of smug validation and comments about how he “knew that it’d turn out like this”, and it would’ve been better for Paranoia to have never had met them. 

But Deceit wasn’t always as good of a liar as he thought he was, especially to Remus, because Remus could hear the sharp undercurrent of relief in everything that he said.

Remus thought that the relief was a bit premature, because while Deceit had focused in on the initial tears and angry words, the contemplative silence and far away, lost in thought looks that stuck with Paranoia for weeks afterwards stood out to Remus far more.

* * *

Remus would say that he and Paranoia were friends. 

Paranoia was fun to talk too, and even more fun to mess with!

He was Remus’s new favorite target. He reacted so much better than the others, even better than Roman! Just a couple of comments about all the bizarre, awful things that could happen to Thomas, or that Thomas could do, and the kid was freaking out over it for hours, sometimes even days! 

Deceit told him to knock it off, but despite what he thought, he wasn’t actually in charge. Based on how he was beginning to chafe under Deceit’s hovering and manipulations, Paranoia agreed.

* * *

Remus was starting to realize that Paranoia, or Anxiety, as he was calling himself now, wasn't quite the doormat they’d originally taken him for.

He spoke up more during discussions about Thomas now, and wasn’t going along with or falling for Deceit’s manipulations anymore. He gave as good as he got, and his tongue was so sharp sometimes that it shocked even Deceit into silence. He was stubborn, and his influence in Thomas got stronger every day. 

Anxiety was increasingly annoyed with Deceit’s constant presence and subtle control. He’d storm off, asking to be left alone. Deceit would follow. They’d fight.

Deceit called Anxiety ungrateful. Anxiety called him a condescending dick. Remus thought if Deceit would just learn to give Anxiety space, they’d get along a lot better.

* * *

Anxiety picked a name, Virgil. 

Remus was the only one that he told. Remus was pretty sure that it was more out of spite against Deceit then affection for him, but he didn’t mind. It was fun to be the one in on a secret for once!

Virgil had already known his name, everyone did, even the light sides. He’d never seen the point of hiding it like the others. Besides, “Intrusive Thoughts” and “Dark Creativity” were both too much of a mouthful to always be called anyways.

Deceit was weird about his name. He’d told Virgil it though. Remus heard him say it while they thought that they were alone. If he was a more sensitive man, he’d have been offended by the favoritism.

* * *

Virgil met Thomas. Remus didn’t know that was something that they could do, Virgil was now the only one of them that had. Deceit was pissed.

* * *

Virgil and Deceit were arguing again. They did that a lot now. When Virgil was actually around anyways. He wasn’t around as much any more.

Deceit thought that he was off with the light sides. 

Sometimes he was. Remus had occasionally overheard them arguing. But Virgil spent more time alone now then he did with any of the other sides.

Remus wondered if he was lonely.

* * *

Virgil didn’t call Deceit by his name anymore.

* * *

Things had finally reached the boiling point. All of the tension, the passive aggressive slights, the fighting, had led to this. Remus had known that it was coming. 

The argument had at some point shifted from Thomas to other more personal issues. They were both shouting. They knew each other well enough to know all of each other's weak points,and they were both hitting every single one. 

Virgil’s hands were shaking, and he looked close to tears. He’d always had trouble keeping his composure during arguments. 

Remus usually hovered around the edges of their fights, never fully involving himself beyond egging them on, but he’d been pulled into this one. 

He sided with Deceit. At the end of the day, he always would. He liked Virgil a lot, possibly even more than he liked Deceit, but he and Deceit had far more history, and loyalty. And although he had never said it out loud until now, he agreed with him. Virgil’s moral standards had always been too high to come close to matching up with Deceit’s, let alone his. 

Remus didn’t know if Deceit really meant it when he told Virgil to leave, but by the stricken look on his face Virgil obviously did.

He looked at Remus for support, but in a momentary swap of roles, Remus found that he couldn’t meet his eyes.

Virgil left, cursing and slamming the door behind him. 

Deceit, a man usually incapable of not having the last word, was so still and silent that it looked like he could’ve been carved from stone.

* * *

Virgil’s door was gone from the dark side. It wasn’t in the light sides half either though. Remus couldn’t find it anywhere he looked, although he could still sink in when he wanted to. Well, he could, if Virgil didn’t kick him out everytime he did. Apparently he was still bitter over Remus siding with Deceit. And possibly over all the anxiety attacks he’d caused with only a sentence about how easy it would be for Thomas to wander into traffic, or stab his brother. Whatever. Some people held grudges over the littlest of things.

He thought Deceit would be happy to hear about Virgil’s door. That had been the biggest point of contention between the two, how much time Virgil spent with the light sides. But when he told him, Deceit just looked perturbed.

* * *

It was quieter without Virgil. Which was weird, considering how quiet Virgil was most of the time. 

Remus missed him, really, but not as much as Deceit seemed too. Remus thought he was being a bit over dramatic about it. They were all still in the same mindscape after all. If Deceit wanted to, he could just go see him. He was just a single conscious decision to sink away! But Deceit was far too prideful for that, so for now he was sticking to his broodingly watching from afar routine.

Remus had almost forgotten what Deceit had bees like before Virgil had shown up and helped smooth his edges. He seemed even worse than before though, his remarks cruler and more cutting. But Remus couldn't bring himself to be offended by it. Deceit seemed more hurt than anything else.

Not that he’d ever admit it.

* * *

Remus had honestly forgotten that Deceit hadn’t known Virgil’s name. When he only referred to him as Paranoia, Remus had assumed that he was just being a dick, which was partially true since Virgil hadn’t gone by Paranoia in a while now, or that he was just belatedly doing that thing were you don’t call a pet by a name in order to distance yourself from it so that your not too upset when you have to eat it (or in this case, when it leaves). 

But from the at first hurt, then furious expression on his face after they'd heard Morality call him “Virgil”, Remus realized that Virgil must’ve never told him.

In hindsight, the timing made sense. By the time Virgil had picked a name, he and Deciet’s constant fighting was just starting to pick up. And not long after that, Virgil had left them. 

He could’ve attempted to explain that to Deceit, but honestly, the ranting was kind of funny. He didn’t get to see Deceit this visibly angry very often after all. He was more the passive aggressive type usually. Virgil had always brought out the most from Deceit though, in positives and negatives, so it wasn’t that surprising.

Remus wisely decided not to tell him that he’d known it too.

* * *

Renus had known that Deceit had some scheme planned. Between the overly smug looks and the ominous, please ask me what I’m planning so I can not tell you about it, comments over the past couple of weeks it was pretty obvious. Remus had never taken the bait though, so he hadn’t known what. He’d assumed that it was something Virgil related. 

Surprisingly, it wasn’t. It was at least mostly Thomas related! Remus was almost proud! Or, he would’ve been, if Deceit hadn’t gotten back and talked about/not talking about but definitely talking about, Virgil for several hours. But, baby steps. Progress is progress he supposes.

Remus had gotten a good laugh at imagining the look on the light side’s faces after they realized that Deceit had been impersonating Morality. It must’ve been hysterical! He wished that he’d been there!

Now that, that was an idea…

He hadn’t seen his dear brother in awhile! And now that Deceit was out, he couldn’t tell him to stay in hiding anymore without being a hypocrite. Maybe it was time that he introduced himself too. This would be fun! 

Deceit was ranting again. Although he’d probably prefer to call it monologuing (it sounded more dignified or something). He was saying something about how “Paranoia was playing at being a light side” and that he’d be “back where he belonged, with them after he got tired of playing pretend. 

Remus didn’t have the heart to tell him that he was pretty sure that Virgil had never belonged with them to begin with.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first time writing anything for the Sander Side's. I never expected Remus to be the first character that I wrote about, but here we are! He's a really hard character for me to write, so hopefully I did a decent job at keeping him in character.
> 
> I'm m-tries-to-write on Tumblr if you want to go scream about headcanons and stuff with me, and I do occasionally take prompts. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! I hope that you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!


End file.
